Sunday, July 25, 2010

i still do, and will always, love you

just before i moved here, i was tired of worrying. i was tired of being angry. i was tired of the drama. and i was tired of fighting.

the 10 days i spent with you initially were amazing. i never fought, never worried, never feared, i wasn't angry, i wasn't stressed out.

i was happy.

and even through all the anxiety, fear, these last 3 weeks... i was happy for a minute here. i reconciled my anxieties, and accepted & loved the new life i chose. my life, with my man, in our home.

every reason i can think of is telling me to stay; and every other reason i can think of is telling me to go.

if you truly want us to be over; if there is no glimmer of hope anywhere; i will go.

there are very few reasons that could make me stay...

give me one reason to stay here, and i'll turn right back around.

______


how do i stop myself from crawling into bed next to him?

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